Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Randomize
