remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
