Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize