OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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