if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
