That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
