I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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