I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
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So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
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I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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