Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize