You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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