All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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