Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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