i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize