that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
