Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut. http://tfl.nu/wfck
  Replies (126) Good night (1482) Bad night (3875)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough. http://tfl.nu/js6s
  Replies (19) Good night (5936) Bad night (1310)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown. (+44): before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN http://tfl.nu/72q0
  Replies (28) Good night (8740) Bad night (1452)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything. http://tfl.nu/e1ys
  Replies (84) Good night (2023) Bad night (6889)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car. http://tfl.nu/1lh8
  Replies (7) Good night (599) Bad night (1906)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired. http://tfl.nu/sykd
  Replies (1) Good night (2498) Bad night (806)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (931): Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me? http://tfl.nu/cqgr
  Replies (6) Good night (692) Bad night (2187)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction http://tfl.nu/kbcm
  Replies (4) Good night (1383) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie. http://tfl.nu/zzfj
  Replies (17) Good night (3476) Bad night (1091)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you

  (571): View more from Virginia

  Bonus points are bonus points regardless

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you (571): Bonus points are bonus points regardless http://tfl.nu/vyof
  Replies (10) Good night (1146) Bad night (1081)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles" http://tfl.nu/ewys
  Replies (7) Good night (1451) Bad night (915)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird http://tfl.nu/qw9p
  Replies (5) Good night (861) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra? http://tfl.nu/q2ra
  Replies (4) Good night (602) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you. http://tfl.nu/sh0v
  Replies (1) Good night (343) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao http://tfl.nu/25uv
  Replies (3) Good night (605) Bad night (273)

Randomize