He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize