My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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