You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
love makes seman taste better
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you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
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Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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