Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
