Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
