I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
