everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize