You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
