THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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