the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
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