Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
