if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Randomize
