idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
