You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
