My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize