Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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