I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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