I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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