The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize