I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
