they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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