His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize