they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
