Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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