Buhtt sex?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
