have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
