I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
