THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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