oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize