If i come over, it means nothing
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
