3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
