elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
