what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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