spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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