Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize